Too much research???

Is there such a thing as too much research? From my point of view YES would be the answer. At some point you need to make a decision. 

Let’s say your researching a car. You research all the companies. Then you research all of the makes you like. Then about the time you are close to making a decision…another line of cars come out. And the cycle keeps happening because you just can’t make a final decision . That is a lot of money and a huge decision you don’t want to make the wrong one…so you research and research and even when your car breaks down (again). And you keep pouring money into the old heap because you are worried about making the wrong decision. If you keep this up you will end up with a completely broken down car and then you make a more rash decision because you just need transportation. 

Ok another sample…

Say your looking to buy a house. Another big ticket item. You look and look. You find the one that is perfect… But you start overthinking it. What if you lose your job? What if you family grows too big too fast? What if your mother in law comes to stay? About the time you decide to go ahead someone else buys the house. And you have to start all over again.

Or say your looking into a new computer software for your company. It is business specific so there are like 5 top softwares. And you research each of them. You like one but the mostly cost is quite high. So you go on the road to see the software in action and ask other companies what software they like and why. You make a decision that you really like that software. Now your 18 months into looking into which software you want to switch to. You have gone back and forth for 12 of those 18 months. Now your back up to 2 softwares you might get. New updates show up…now what? You check out the top 5 to see which ones have upgraded their software and check their new prices to see if they are more competitive since more softwares are now offering what brought you to the final 2 decision you had made. And your back to square one.

You need to do a thorough research:

Check out the company… Is it solid? How long have they been in business? What other companies use their product? What do their consumers say about them and their product? Are the people reccomending them getting any sort of a kick back for reccomending them?

Check out their product… What features do you like about their product? What makes their product better than their competitors? Do they have the features you need for you or your business? Is there a lot of extra bells and whistles that you do not need? Do they have price drops for removing what you don’t need and leaving just the options you do need?

Check out their customer service department… Can you get through when you call? What is the wait times? Do they speak your language fluently or is there a communication barrier? What are their ratings with their customers? What is their response times? Do they charge extra? 

Advertisements

Politics….should not be a bad reference.

The political season is upon us and I for one am tired of being a pawn in their smear campaigns. I don’t even know what they stand for unless I go online and research it. Because all they do is bad mouth each other on the commercials. I DVR and rush through the commercials because I do not want to hear it. They waist millions of not more on tv!!! (No one wants to see that) You would think they would have gotten that by now. But sadly for all of us they have not.

Our country was built on honesty. The people we put into office should be trusted. But it has become so corrupt. We need to get rid of all of them. Start over and make a few more rules for those in office.

1) Term limit for all politicians. No more than 2 terms for any person in office. Too much time in office appears to make for complacent and lazy. And the longer in office seem to be more easily bought off and are less concerned for the people they represent.

2) No more lobbyist. That is very very corrupt. Politicians make so much side money that what we pay them means nothing. They are not voting the way we would want them to because they pay more. 

3) Bring to the people what you want to vote on in session. Advertise the issues and let us decide and then vote our way and if you don’t you get ousted immediately. Remember you are there to represent your people not yourself. We should actually think about popular vote on all items and reduce the amount of politicians on the payroll.

4) No more earmarks on any bill. The bill is only about one subject and nothing gets put in there about any other subject. That shit is rediculous!! Tricky and wrong on so many levels. I cannot believe you have gotten away with this shit for so long!!!

5) NO MORE NEGATIVE CAMPAIGNS! We are so sick and tired of hearing the bad things about your opponent. How about only clean campaign. Win it on what you stand for. Not what bad thing your opponent might have done 10 years a ago. I do not care. What do you stand for. Where do you stand on important issues. 

6)  When you leave office … You leave office. We do not continue to pay you for the rest of your life. Go back to work and become a part of the regular civilian population again. It is expected of our military that see ungodly things in order to protect all of us so why not the politicians as well. 

7) Your pay is to be based on your productivity while in office. How many votes did you attend? You only get paid for those you attend. How many days were you in your office working? You only get paid for those days you actually work. Maybe more work for the people will happen if this was in place now. The people would be amazed at how many politicians actually showed up for every vote on bills that takes place. 

8) No more divisions… In other words …no more democrats or republicans or independents. How about “you were hired by the people and you stand for the people that you represent of the United States. Not the divided states.”

We should be a united country with different opinions. Which we are all entitled to. And the most popular opinion wins on each item up for vote. 

These rules should apply to all offices from town to city to state to country. From mayors to representatives to senators to president. Every aspect of running this country. 

This would be my wish for this country to move forward for the people not the big companies that run it now. 

Oh and to run this country you should be born in this country and have served this country in some fashion. And serving in the military should trump all else with an honorable discharge of course.

Thank you to all who have served and are serving currently. You are all awesome and I for one appreciate what you have done and are doing to protect myself as well as everyone else in this country!!!! You are the heroes!!!!

What is my PURPOSE?

Well I have been trying to figure that out over the past few months. I have listened to several people’s podcasts. Chalene Johnson, Mariah Coz, Dr. McKayla…and more. Passion, purpose, hobby, job, career.  I am still confused. I cannot figure this out…I am not an unintelligent person but this just has me baffled. Let me try to explain.

I manage a dry cleaners. I love what I do. I work too many hours so sometimes I feel burnt out but somehow I get re-energized. Most of my employees are awesome but there are a few that challenge me. And there are some positions that seem to have a revolving door and there is always a new person in the mix. I want to spend less time at work and more time at home and with my grand children. But I feel more needed at work. Now my work kids are always asking my advise about well a lot of things. I am like their mother. They come to me about their personal lives and what to do in all kinds of situations. I always tell them what I truly think no sugar coating it. And they get mad at me sometimes but respect the fact that I am most of the time right on the money. They think I am great. (Their words). Now with my own children I speak my mind with my youngest, mostly speak my mind to the eldest…but my middle child I walk on eggshells. That situation is shall we say not a stable one. 

People come to me for advice on 

Boyfriends, girlfriends, stains on their clothes, where to buy this or that, self esteem issues, anxiety issues, love, hate, parents, children, exes, how thei item was or was not cleaned or pressed correctly or how they requested. How to press this or that, can you print me this or that, how do I log into this or that, how do I operate my phone, where can I find a replacement????

Now I am not saying I have a degree in any of these areas… But people ask me about these things and more. And I answer to the best of my ability and knowledge or I Reccomended them to find another person and how to go about doing that. 

But there is no one or even two things in that for me to focus on to even begin to figure out my purpose or passion. Heck I out together a greenhouse a few weeks ago and loved doing it. Just a few days ago I put in a cement floor in it. Really loved doing that too! I enjoy computer stuff as well. I am so all over the place it is crazy. 

And yes I am a people pleaser. I love making everyone happy and smiling. It really drains me when I let someone down. Even if it really wasn’t me but I didn’t double check that one thing and it didn’t get done right…bugs the heck out of me!!! I know I cannot make everyone happy. I have come to terms with that. “Sorry I really tried everything I could but that spot just isn’t coming out” I don’t like saying it so if I do say it you know I tried everything but literally cutting the stain out to remove it. I am far from perfect and so is everyone on my staff most of us try real hard but mistakes happen. And I try to not make excuses just solutions if there are any to be made. If you are still unhappy then you can be on your merry little way and I hope you can find someone that can make you happy. 

But is all of this there is more. I love being outdoors. I love photography and playing around with the photos I have taken and making something new and wonderful out of them. I really swear there will never be enough hours in a day for me to do everything I truly enjoy doing. But the fact remains I enjoy my career. I enjoy most of the people I am around there. My favorite part is 1) seeing the smiles on my customers faces and 2) after hours when the magic happens that creates those smiles. I do personally work on the specialty items and antique items. I have two people now in training helping we with those items. An employee for a couple of years now and recently (sort of but some over the years) my daughter and now employee. Training my art can only be done in a dry cleaners and that limits me. I do not want my competition to have my knowledge. Other towns and cities I don’t mind but I am a working manager. So I work Monday through Friday 6:30 am until at least closing. Although recently I have been trying to take off early at least one day a week. But that happens almost every other week. The weekends are for my husband. 

So still figuring out what my purpose is and my passion and the difference between them. 48 and still going strong!

Timeouts

You would think I was talking about child rearing but I am not. I am talking about workaholics like myself. I work 12 to 14 hour days. Monday through Friday and the weekend is for my husband and family. I am in demand all day…if not by an employee it is a customer on the phone or in the lobby, or even a sales call on the phone. Anything from equipment not working right to the boss has a question about something in the office. I am pulled every which way for most of my day. Even when I try to sneak in a quick bathroom break…I no sooner get in there I have someone outside the door hollering my name to ask me a question or tell me I have a phone call. 

We need timeouts…silent moments where there is no calls or interuptions. Just some time for ourselves. That is hard to do. I have a hard time shutting down and being unavailable. UNAVAILABE…no one like to be unavailable. But for our health and sanity we need to take a step back and look at the bigger picture. 

Nothing is going to go so drastically wrong in an hour that we cannot fix when we get back. There is always a learning opportunity…at least that is what I tell my team. So if they mess up while I am gone I just call it a “learning opportunity”. What to do the next time I am unavailable. 

I know this was short but I need a little me time. I will be taking a timeout.

Miscarriage

So it seems I am the statistic…

1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage, missed abortion or stillbirth.  I have 3 wonderful children. But I often think about the one I lost. 

I had what is known as a missed abortion. My baby died while in the womb but my body did not expell her. I had to go through the process of believing I was still carrying a live baby and when they could not find a heartbeat I had to go through a vaginal ultrasound to try to find the heartbeat. They never found it. She was gone. I wasn’t far enough along to have to actually give birth to her. Which i am sure is much harder than what I had to endure.  I had to go through what is known as a D & C. (Dilation and curettage) The removal of the tissue from a miscarriage.

This happened to me in 1991. Computers were not in every home. My family was poor and had no computer or knowledge of any support groups. I mention this because myself and many many other women went through our losses alone with little to no support. Today we have computers in almost every home and phone that connect to the Internet. We have support groups right at our fingertips. 

Here are a couple of links for those of you that do not know where to look or are too depressed to look. 

http://miscarriage.supportgroups.com/

http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Miscarriage-Stillbirth/support-group

http://americanpregnancy.org/pregnancy-loss/miscarriage-surviving-emotionally/

I still think about her and miss her. I wish I had all 4 of my children with me today. But the fact is I do not. I will never get to hold her or hear her laugh, read her books, take her to her first day of school, graduate high school, get married or have children of her own. I still get tears for her… And I always will. I think it is healthy to grieve for your loss. Just try real hard not to let it consume you. Your child would not want that for you. 

Crazier things have NOT happened.

So I am not sure at this point what is going on in my mothers head. She is now listening at the door of my daughters room. No privacy…. The other night my daughter put her girls to bed and her girlfriend had brought her some wine. She had a rough day…and they had gone to bed planning on cleaning the kitchen in the morning. 

So my mom procedes to pull my daughter to the side as she got home from work and have this conversation with her.

My mom “Honey, my dog woke me up at about 1 in the morning last night. When I got to the kitchen it was still a mess. I was worried that something was wrong so I started towards your room and heard some noises. I almost knocked on the door but I just wasn’t sure if you were in pain or if you were having great lesbian sex.”

My daughter “Well grandma, as you can see I am just fine and I was not in any pain.” Hoping that would be enough she started to walk away. But no, my mother was not yet done.

My mother “So I walked back into the kitchen and cleaned up some of the dishes and again heard some noises from your room. I wasn’t sure if it was you in pain so I walked to your room and listened for a bit just to make sure you were ok.  Now I do not know if it was you or your girlfriend but at this point I was sure that you were not in pain, just having great lesbian sex.”  “So I went back to my bedroom and told your grandpa that you were fine just having great lesbian sex.” 

My daughter of course is just flabbergasted and is not sure what to say. She walks away to inform her girlfriend that her grandmother had eavesdropped during their shenanigans. And she was not sure how to handle that. Especially since my mother tends to wait outside the bathroom when my fighters girlfriend takes a shower. She has heard her scratch at the door trying to get her attention. So she tends to sit and wait until she hears my mother walk to the other room and then runs back to the bedroom. 

There seems to be nothing off limits to my mother. But I also must say…my children are very open with me about their “shenanigans ” sometimes to the point of TMI. But if I so much and mention mine and their dads they are done. Too funny. I tend to play on that just to mess with them. And then just laugh…

I am glad I have an open relationship with my children. But they really do not want to have that same type of relationship with their grandmother. It is just very awkward for them. She of course sees nothing wrong with it.

 To be honest we think my mother has a crush on my daughters girlfriend. They way she is always trying to message her and rub her legs and stuff. Kinda creepy. But maybe she is just way too lonely. Whatever her reasons are it really makes those 2 girls uncomfortable to be around her and try to make mad dashes from their room the the bathroom and back. Or dashing straight to the front door to leave. 

I love my mother but she really needs to be given some boundaries. I am sure she is going to start asking for details on how all that works. So I told my daughter to just put in a video and say watch and learn. The. Walk away. Lol Now that is a look on my mothers face I would like to see…but not actually be there for the inquisition of questions about what she was watching. 

Passion

These are a few of the people I work with on a daily basis. We work hard and try to have some fun doing that. I am passionate about making you look great! It is so funny because my kids get frustrated with me. I see them with wrinkled shirts or shorts in desperate need of being pressed and I of course tell them 

“You know I work at a drycleaners and I know some really awesome pressers that can make _____ look so much better.”

They laugh at me and say…these are my raggedy lay around the house _____.  I have no response. Lol

Shirts and blouses should be pressed and collars folded at just that right spot. Golf shirts should have that collar and placket pressed so that you look sharp at that first glance. Sport coats should have those lapels pressed and folded at just the right place for single or double breasted. Ties should be steamed and sides rolling for that nice just bought look. Dresses now those are tricky. The top should be pressed so that it flows gently over you to meet the waistline then flowing down to bring out that femininity. Pants should be pressed with that sharp crease from the pleat to to cuff…and for those that prefer no crease pressed so that the pants run down the leaf and just over the top of the shoe finishing that professional and relaxed business person look.

I just feel that if your clothes look great then you feel great in them. There is that old saying.

“The clothes make the person.”

Well I agree that you feel better when your in some well fitted and well pressed clothes. Unless it is your Saturday vegging out relaxing in your sweatpants day. 

I am also very particular about household items. I like the drape pleats to be pressed and sharp. I like the linen tablecloths and napkins to be bright and crisp. I love those comforters to be fluffy and smooth. 

Wedding Dresses… My favorite and my nemesis… I love wedding dresses and hate them at the same time. I love taking a wedding dress that has been put through the ringer and making it look almost if not new again! But there are those dresses that sometimes make that an impossible task. Silk wedding dresses are the hardest to work on. I am always trying the latest and the greatest for stain removal on silk trying to bring them back to life and sometimes it just cannot be done….not unless you are willing to pay a very high price to have each little inch to me carefully cleaned by methods that take hours to do. And I am talking hundreds to a thousand dollars for the time that would take. Some have paid that price and it took weeks of spare time devoted to a dress to bring it back one inch at a time. I have restored vintage dresses. But to see the smiles on the faces of the owners of those items it just makes me happy to see that joy!!!

When we do alterations on your clothing items I like to make sure that those altered areas are pressed out and lay flat so that it is un-noticeable that any alterations have been done. Better fit better feel. 

Basically I try to ensure that you have the best experience you can with a dry cleaners. 

That being said … We are human and occasionally we can make a mistake. It is how we handle such mistake that makes your experience good or bad. I have made failures in that regard and there is no excuse for me. All I can say is that I learn from those mistakes and hopefully never make the same on twice.

Thank you for reading this and I hope you have an awesome day tomorrow!